Micro cheating refers to tiny acts of infidelity that usually lead to full-blown affairs. Unbeknownst to most of us, these tiny acts are subtle and often skirt between fidelity and infidelity. They feel so small and inconsequential at the moment but cease to be after the fact if not told to the person you’re dating at the time.
Mirco cheating recently become a hot topic of discussion which has span from several years of different generational mishaps when it comes to relationships and what is regarded as cheating or not in the eyes of different partners.
According to Cosmopolitan, micro-cheating is the term for small things you do that could have whispers of infidelity—without ever physically crossing a line. Those tiny moves can take you into territories you might regret.
Though being caught in the physical act of cheating is publically condemned and hurts like hell, one can’t rule out that micro-cheating isn’t the same either especially if one of you find it hurtful. These are warning signs to be aware of if you notice your partner is micro-cheating.
7 noticeable signs that your partner is micro cheating
1. Stalking your ex
Yes, it is micro cheating when you continuously check your ex’s social media activity and you can’t stop talking about them. It is okay to be mildly curious about an ex but incessantly doing it are signs that you’re still emotionally attached.
A 2015 study, which was published in the Journal of Sexual and Marital Therapy and based on interviews with seven U.K. couples counsellors, found that just about anything, from sexting to lying to intercourse, could be considered cheating — or not — depending on a person’s perspective. In the end, the authors concluded that the study “demonstrates the existence of multiple, conflicting definitions of infidelity.”
2. Falling for thirst-traps
It is okay to notice thirst-traps and acknowledge that you like what you see, but do not engage. Do not like, comment, or slide into DMs. For someone in a committed and exclusive relationship, falling for thirst traps is flying way too close to the sun. It is an act of micro cheating.
A thirst-trap is a naughty/sexy photo posted online to attract attention. The intention is to draw you in to like, compliment, or DM. They’re “look at my ass, thunder thighs or cleavage!”
So, if your girlfriend or boyfriend is one those that have been recently falling for thirst-traps too often then, there is need to worry because something is definitely growing that you may not be aware of.
3. Maintaining active dating profiles
Being committed and exclusive means that you don’t have active dating profiles lest you have a convenient exit door. Whatever reason you give for keeping your dating profiles active does not take away the fact that it is an exit strategy and an act of micro cheating. What if you see someone you like? Are you really going to not message them?
4. Not inviting your partner to certain events
It is okay for partners to have different interests as it comes to social gatherings but If you find yourself purposefully not inviting your partner to events, it might be because there’s someone there you don’t want them to meet, or you don’t want this other person to see that you’re in a committed relationship.
Doing this qualifies as micro cheating. Frequenting these events without your partner opens you up to being considered single or unattached. How many times has your significant left you hanging when it comes to going out? We bet you’re already connecting the dots right about now. 🙄 😆
5. Being protective of your phone
Have you saved your crush under a fake name, overly protective about your phone? If your answer is yes, then you’re probably doing something shady – micro-cheating – and that your partner wouldn’t approve so you are going out of your way to hide it.
6. Sins of omission
When you meet someone new, it’s common to chat with them about your life, but it’s a problem if you don’t mention that you’re in a committed relationship. While you may not be out-rightly lying, you’re lying by omission by not mentioning that there’s a whole person you happen to share a home/life with.
7. Spending time with someone in a meaningful way and not telling your partner
If you spend meaningful time with someone, whether it be meeting someone for coffee or dancing with them at a bar, and you don’t then tell your partner, you should ask yourself why.
If you don’t mention your partner to someone, it’d be important for you to figure out why. You could be trying to portray yourself as single, and that’s not okay if you want to remain in your committed relationship.
Anything done in secret from your partner is a sign you’re not doing something you believe is appropriate. Just because it didn’t go further doesn’t mean it’s not a big deal. It’s micro-cheating. Affairs do not begin out of anywhere. They start small and build, and micro-cheating is the very smallest way they can begin.
When you catch yourself committing some of these shady subtle behaviours, it’s time to look at yourself. It’s likely time for you to have an open conversation with your partner. You could be unconsciously hungering for something more.
Each act of micro cheating is indicative of a problem. Some people cheat because of a problem within themselves. Others feel tempted because of a problem within the relationship.
Author: Derrick Ogwal
Derrick is a freelance writer and consultant for Newslibre.