Love is a very strong emotion. It can bring us close and yet at times it can push us further away. There is a very thin line between showing affection and suffocating him with the same.
Unless you pay close attention to your relationship, you’ll realize there is a thin cloud that prevents a happy tale from becoming a tragic tale.
You need to study your partner well. Know how to love them right without smothering them. Here is how to do that;
1. Praise and approval
Men are ego-driven creatures that like reassurance about themselves, their ambitions, their efforts as lovers, sexual prowess and how they look. While it may be true that men need less verbal praise than their girls, it is necessary to praise them.
Ladies let your praise loose. Tell your man what you find attractive about him. Tell him how attractive it is when he says something a certain way or when he accomplishes something. Your praise won’t make him cocky; it will help him feel loved.
2. Physical touch
Men need non-sexual touches as frequent as ladies do. Hold his hand while you take a stroll on the streets. That registers to him as, “I love you and I will always be here for you.”
Come up from behind and hold his waist or neck while he is absorbed in thoughts. Trust me; this could make him feel just as loved as the first time you met, depending on his mood. This doesn’t stifle him. It’s actually sexy.
3. Regulate the love
Can too much love ever be a bad thing? Yes. Why? When you fall in love with someone, it’s natural to want to shower them with love and affection.
Truth be told, too much love should never be a bad thing but you can make your partner hate it when it becomes stifling. You should always keep in mind that it’s good to give this person time to miss you.
Showing too much affection sometimes makes them dislike you or your affection. Well this is relative and subjective. What might be too much for one, it could be what the other is looking for. Study your partner well.
4. Give him space to grow
Well most of you only give yourselves space when things hit south. It should never be done that way. Spending time with each other can feel great but even if you are having the time of your life in his arms, learn to back away and give him space every now and then.
Guys love space to breathe, think and grow. Don’t wait for him to ask for it. You need to see this yourself. Balancing togetherness and space is not easy, but it’s worth the effort. Remember absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Also read: Open Letter to My Neighbor that Smokes Too Much Pot
5. Regulate the constant calls
Keeping in touch is awesome and acceptable but wanting an update of your man’s life every hour is just dumb and obsessive.
Unless your man likes staying in touch constantly, avoid this behavior. Most girls do this when their man is out with his boys and in company of some hot kyaanas. If you do this, or keep sending him “I miss you” texts when is out and you are home alone, girlfriend you are bored!
This is another case of stifling and misusing love. Avoid it and you will enjoy your relationship peacefully.
6. Balance your romance
Do not be the street dog that asks so much of everything. If you want him to love you right, both of you need to feel involved in each other’s lives in more aspects than just love.
Learn to be his friend and a confidante. Guys love care so much more than girls do. Be his ear and shoulder. By doing this, you will avoid feeling jealous of any female that gets close to him as a friend.
Better your relationship with perfect balance of love, sex and friendship. With this he will love you till you die like he promised.
7. Trust him and avoid feeling insecure
Subtle insecurity can suffocate him out of the relationship. If you feel you have the best lover in the world and you over do it because you think he will think less of you or leave you for someone else, and then maybe you are inviting it to happen.
You cannot constantly prove your love for someone else all the freaking time. The more you go proving your love all the time, the more you will build yourself up for heartbreak.
8. Stop craving for too much attention
Can you sit beside your guy for thirty bloody minutes without seeking their attention? If you are the touchy, feely and giggly partner who looks for ways to distract their man, then you better put a pause to it.
This maybe ok if you are still new in love, but not ok at all if you have been together for quite a while. Everyone wants attention but not the kind that is going to make him wish you had stayed in-doors.
The more you crave for attention, the more likely he is to shy away and most probably you will end up being pressured into smothering him with affection and PDA (Public Display of Affection) in hope of reciprocation. If this continues, one of you will opt out of the relationship.
Do you think we missed something out of this list? If so, go ahead and share with us your views by hitting that comment button.
Author: Lynn Aheebwa
Lynn is a freelance writer for Newslibre and has been writing for Campus Bee for a while now. Writing is her loudest voice and biggest expression.
