The gods of Buganda, where Kampala sits must be pissed off. I could make a list of reasons why they ought to be pissed, it isn’t hard to compile. Most of them would be political of course, and they would probably get me into a lot of trouble.
Since we are already spiraling out of control and with Dooms Day (Tojjikwatako) upon us, I might as well. But not today. Today am ranting about something else.
Some bad days take an interesting twist when you enter a clean UBB taxi, get a nice middle row seat, and your neighbor is a pretty girl who keeps tapping away on her 6 inch Tecno. It gets even better when she gets a phone call and she sounds as good as she looks.
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In that moment, the headphones weighing heavy on your head break in Machel Montano’s “Fast Wine” and the mood is just right. But you won’t say a thing to her. Where do you start?
She could be in a relationship. She’s too fine to be sleeping in bed alone. Even worse, she could be a slay queen. Which is worse than dating a witch doctor’s daughter who is also a witch doctor.
All this while you are around UMI on Jinja road, comfortably stuck in traffic jam. You are not complaining or frustrated, not at all. You know someone that’s still stuck at the Total opposite Uganda House wishes they were where you are now. For them, there is no hope of getting home tonight or even the next day.
Then suddenly, a ‘moron’ interrupts the mood. As you day dream, coming up with appropriate baby names for you and your hot neighbor’s baby, uncoordinated sirens aggressively buzz from the back of the queue. “God have mercy on his soul,” you think to yourself. But nope! It’s not an ambulance.
Amidst that body to body, bumper to bumper type of congestion, these thoughtless VIP & Police escort drivers, want you to mount the car in front of you to make way for the VIP. They do this all the time. They clearly can see that the jam is so stiff, you can only follow in queue, but they want you to make way.
This is a government official, riding around in a car bought by our taxes, fuel funded by our taxes, not late for anything, because official working hours are 8:00 am to 5:00 pm. It is 7:03 pm now, but he feels, it’s urgent that he must get home and catch NTV’s “Second Chance” at 8:00 pm.
The very rude officers in the lead car even howl insults and threats at motorists that refuse to make way. The motorists refuse to make way simply because there is nowhere to go.
The convoy of the NRM Secretary General, Justine Lumumba Kasule knocked and killed Jane Namara at Kajjansi in July this year. Why? Some of the drivers of these VIP convoys are insanely irresponsible. They have become a public hazard.
It frustrates me, very much, that these VIPS and their escorts have turned this ‘privilege’ into an opportunity to disobey traffic laws (and get away with it.) And also, to make other motorists and pedestrians and cyclists very inconvenienced as they rush home to watch TV.
The next time I am driving, they’ll have to plough me out of the car before I can make way. If we are stuck, let it be a group thing, after all, it’s your “supreme leader” that has caused all this.
Author: Ian Paul Byamugisha
Ian Paul Byamugisha is a writer/author/novelist and car journalist. As a writer for Newslibre, he writes car reviews, cars news, tech news and anything that one might find interesting to read. Currently working on a spy novel collection titled “Arthur Vintage.”